All Up In: Meditation, Parenting & How to Create Communities of Women with Katy Rexing

Music.Welcome to All Up In My Lady Business. I am your host, Mary Nesey. On this podcast,I'll explore the fine line between having it together and losing your shit. Here I share my journey as an entrepreneur, a mom, a wife, a DJ, and randomly a beekeeper. I have no shame and no filter except the ones I use on Instagram. My stories of resilience, a little structure,and a lot of resourcefulness can show you how to take those same things and live your life with your whole ass. Thanks for listening.Music.Alright folks, thanks so much for tuning in today. I have the illustrious,amazing Katie Rexing all up in this piece today. She has four kids. She is a chef, which I really want to dig into. Blogger. She's down a uterus. And she is here today on all up in my lady business.Thanks so much for being here. I just adore you. I'm so happy I could do this with you and just really like see your face and have a good catch up with you.It feels so good. I've missed you.I have missed you too. I think about you all the time. I know that sounds very weird.You forgot that I was your new best friend.No, I didn't forget.There's no forgetting. I wanna give a little backstory to how I met Katie.I met Katie a mere five months ago in February of 2023.We met at the famous yoga retreat that I went to in Panama and Katie wasn't there last year.So she was there this year and she was like new meat. It was like, who's this new person?Who are these new people? We are the sharks, they're the jets.It wasn't that at all. And I wound up sitting next to Katie pretty early on in the trip,maybe the second night, maybe even the first night.And we started talking and I felt like you were like peering into my soul.And I felt it was a really important conversation that I kind of went over my head many times since then.And then we just talked a lot during the trip and I just find you fascinating.So Katie is a blogger and let's get into it. So you have a tribe on the internet of people that love you, and I'd love to hear how this happened. So where are you from?Yeah. Okay. I'm from Ohio, originally from the Midwest, and then grew up in the Midwest, went to school in Ohio, and then met my husband, John Paul, in Chicago. I moved there right after school.I worked in advertising.Yeah. Really? Like an account executive. So I was like the go-between, the creatives and the client.And I did that for several years.My first client was Kraft Mac and Cheese, which is so funny.I don't give it to my kids now. I was slapping up Velveeta shells and cheese. And I remember one day looking at my boss's boss, and it was an all-female team, and it was really small. And I looked at her, and she was working so many hours. I'm sure you remember, this This is the day of like.Old school, like boys world, boys club. And it was just really rough and tough. And I remember looking at her and seeing how hard she worked. I remember thinking, I don't want her job.And I was like, okay, that's a problem. And I don't want my boss's job. And I knew I had to leave advertising. So anyway, I ended up leaving advertising. And then it's a whole slew of things.But since then, John Paul and I have kind of like moved around a few different times. We were in Chicago for a while, on the East Coast for a while. And now we're in California. And since then popped out a couple kids. Four, yeah. So many kids, Mary. And the plan was just to have one, maybe two, and then God laughed, and now here we are.Yeah. One of the stories when we met, I remember we were standing in the ocean with waves kind of falling on us, and you're like, yeah, I just sort of like sold my house and just moved to California on a whim. And I'm like, who is this woman that can just just move her whole life and with such calm and clarity and yes, no, you know, it's so funny because I will share people or I meet people here on California and they're like,where are you from? Tell me your story. Why did you guys move? And I explained to them like, well, we moved because I had a vision of living in California and I convinced my husband to sell our house and two months later, we moved to California with our kids. And,the funny thing is, I'm actually not really like a fly by the seat kind of girl. I am usually really planned out, things are well thought through, and I always have a really,good plan. And this was one of the first things in my life where I had no idea what the hell we were doing. I had no expectations. I just knew I didn't see us in the Midwest for a long period of time. And logically, I think if I thought it through, we never would have moved. There was no reason to go. It didn't make any sense. Financially, it didn't make any sense. I've got kids going into high school. None of it made any sense. And so I think was the beauty of it is we sort of made the decision quickly. And then we started doing all the logistics, like we're just going to move and we'll figure it out as we go.And it definitely has not been smooth. And we will be a year in July out here. And we're actually just talking about like, what's next? Like, what do we do now? You're like, yeah, no, like.What are we doing with our life? You know, I think we moved out here, there was a lot of excitement around it. And I will say this, we love California. And we love being in the sunshine.We love the lifestyle it provides our kids. It definitely aligns with how we want to raise our family. But again, I didn't really think through a lot of things. And we found our house online,and we had never seen it. And it's a rental. And we just were like, we saw it. I'm like,this will work. We'll take it. We got on a plane, and we moved here with suitcases.And it really was... It flew. That was a crazy thing. I was like, what did I do? And it's felt really freeing. And I think now we're looking for it to get grown. And again, it's now we're looking like, we need a house. So now we're sort of like like the stress is happening now that I think probably should have happened a year ago.The stress is sort of hitting of like.You know, what are we doing with our kids? Have we fucked them up? Like why are we out here?Well, so you said what you have one in high school,You have a kid going into high school. It happened so fast. I swear everyone says I could go so fast and not to be cliche, but it it really has gone fast The first like decade of motherhood I felt like dragged on forever. I was pulling my hair out. I was like.Bored out not for it was just a lot. It's stressful. It's overwhelming And it's a mental slog.It's a mental slog. And I feel like as the kids are getting older, especially my two oldest, I have an eighth grader now who will be in high school next year, and then a middle school girl.And I have to tell you, these are the best years. They are so fun.Really? The best years.No one says that. Everyone says that. Literally, no one says that.Teenagers. And I'm like, I actually really... And you're the same way though with your little guy.You love him. I love my kids. I don't think they're assholes.You know what I mean?Like them. And I feel like we have a nice banter between us and it's a playful and my expectations of them are like, they're going to be kids, they're going to be teens. And.So I feel like because of that, we just have a nice chemistry between us. And so I'm really enjoying this era with them and I don't want it to go. So it's a boy and then a girl and then, and then two boys. Okay. So one girl. So one just bad-ass girl that's gonna be slogging with her three brothers. It's going to make her so tough.And she rules the roost. Like I'm even afraid of her. Like she definitely rules the roost.Part of me, I'm like, that's really good. It's going to serve her really, really well,you know? And she's awesome. I mean, they're all awesome in their own right. But I think her being raised around three boys is giving her incredible skills that are just going to serve her really, really well. So yeah. I mean, yeah. Did you, do you, what's your sibling? I'm a middle and my husband's a middle too. And so we're both one of three and we both have boy, girl opposite ends. And so we're both like the middle pleaser, like the middle child, the people pleaser, like try to keep like everybody together. I don't know.It's such a good thing that we're both middle kids.Well, I mean, someone's got to be it if there's more than two kids, you know,it's like the other night. So Sebastian is really good on adults. Like I've had a nickel for the number of times like, I can't tell he's autistic. It's like, see him around a child and then you'll.See him. I mean, I think I've made this joke before, but he's kind of like the frog from Looney Tunes at the, hello, my baby. When he's like around the owner, but then when he gets around other people, it's like, and either night I had a friend over and he was just on a tear and and he just wouldn't stop talking.And I had this instinct to tell him to be quiet, like you're talking too much.But then I was like, then I all of a sudden had like a weird flashback to like 1986 and someone telling me that I talk too much and no one wants to hear from you.And so I was like, you know what, this is my child. He talks too much, I talk too much.And like, I don't wanna, I mean, granted, I don't think another white guy is gonna have too much feelings like he doesn't,like no one wants to hear him.But I did feel like I needed to like let him kind of express himself and not let him know that like him talking too much.No, you know, it's so funny though, Mary, you say that is I feel like my kids and not necessarily the same example, I'm talking too much, but there will definitely be moments where I'm like,okay, can we just be whatever this is, can we just be done with this?So whether that's like they're overly hyper, my daughter's super sensitive and really emotional and she'll have these outbursts and I'm like, all right, how much longer is this gonna go on?Because in my insides, it's triggering something in me. I'm like, I remember times when like,it was sort of shut down as you were saying, you know, and it was clearly like I was too much.And it's really something that as a parent now, I've become super aware of those moments I'm like, oh, this is a me problem, not actually a you problem.But it's not even really a you problem. It's almost like you weren't allowed to express that as a kid because it was inconvenient or it was taking too much energy from your parents' brains that were melting down for whatever other reasons were, you know, in our parents'adult eighties brains.It's hard because I find myself.Yelling at Sebastian more than I wish I did and I think to myself like well, my mom yelled at me this is how she got me to do things and so this is how I'm gonna get him to do something and.He doesn't respond well to it and I have to be like to John if we have to find a different way to Communicate this to him because he doesn't respond well to being yelled at like we were and then I'm like, wait a minute Was I?Right, right, right. Right, right. So it actually never really worked, did it?Yeah. And it's not, and like being angry isn't a fun feeling.And I can get to it real fast. It's amazing how quickly. Amazing.Amazing. And I'm going to tell you the long, at least for me, I have found the longer it goes on,the more practice I've had, the more like aware I've become of like, oh, this is actually a trigger for me. The easier it is not to like fly off my handle.But there was a good decade there where my parenting was fly off the handle and really.Lily was like Asher and Lily and my first two were like my testers. I was called Asher with my burnt pancake. And so many... You're just like testing things out. You're like,I'm so sorry. I burned you. And the other pancakes were like perfect golden brown. And he's just like fried, burnt. And he's like, it's okay. I'm fine with that. I'm like, sorry,you're my tester. He's going to go to college and come back with a face tattoo. And you're like, this is the... He's like, this is the burnt pancake.Totally my fault. Totally my fault. He will be in therapy because of me. But I really did like, I did like the 3, 2, 1 parenting. Do you remember that? It's basically just like really strict disciplining. Like I was for sure in the camp of like timeouts and,you know. Yeah. There's always so many things, but yes, keep going. So you were, you were a stressed out parent. Like I'd say the past, I don't know, like five, six years or so that my style of parenting is completely changed. Mortal and like what you're talking about,but I didn't even know. I didn't even realize that it was wrong. I just thought like, well,everybody yells and it was, wasn't it okay. And my mom yelled at me, but it never really felt good inside me. Like it didn't feel good for me as a mom. I always felt them like on edge and I didn't have this like close relationship with the kids that like I thought I want that I thought we were supposed to have and it's really just recently that that's changed.And what changed? What made you what I think a couple of things like one age and then to awareness of my own shit and getting like really honest with myself about like.How I wanted to live and what the problems were and the problems were really like,Me feeling I mean so many things but my own anxieties my own overwhelm my own Unhappiness within like whether it was my marriage or whether it was like feeling like we didn't have enough help We didn't have enough time. We have enough money Like whatever it was, they were just like things I was carrying that then fed into like how I reacted with the kids. And it's taken me just some time to really start owning my own stuff,and cleaning up my side of the street. And I feel like I've become a different mother because of that. I don't know that. What did you do? I think meditation was one of the biggest things for me that really helped me like tune in and become more aware of my own feelings and aware of my own anxieties and emotions and when things bled over into the kids that really weren't because of the kids, it was really because of me. Therapy, and then I know we've talked about this before,but you know I stopped drinking a few years ago and that's really also been a huge game changer in my parenting. I think it's just like allowed me to be more present with the kids, both like in the times I would have been drinking and the next day too, whatever it is. And I feel like I just show up for them in a totally different way. We show up with everything in a totally different way. I mean, I'm a little bit behind you. I think you're at three and a half years.You're a year plus now.I'm like a year and a half. I'm like a year and seven months.And do you feel like it's changed, parenting with Sebastian?Yeah, absolutely. A hundred percent. I try to not carry guilt around with me, but I always am.I have a lot of guilt when I let myself think about it, about how not present I was until I quit.It. And I think I was a much meaner mom. There was a lot more yelling happening.You know, back then. But one of the weird things that happened soon after I quit drinking and I was like hanging out with him, we were just laughing and having such a great time. And.I was like, he's at such a great age. Like this seems like a great age. Like he's being really funny and cool. And then I'm like, oh, wait a minute. Has he always been funny and cool?And I just didn't realize it because I was just trying to like get him out of my life so I could get drunk. Not drunk, but like, you know, because I would start drinking at like five, you know,or six, five or six. And it was like, six if I was being good. And the second that first drink got in, your brain starts numbing and you start doing all the things that you shouldn't be doing instead of hanging out with your kid. Yeah. No, I'm right there 100% with you. I think I always had this division between my time and kid time, mom time. And I felt like whether it be the end of the day or the weekend that I wanted that clear divide. Like, okay, I've been a mom to you.Now I'm going to go over here and have my adult time. And that really was signified by a glass of wine. And my husband and I used to put on a record and we'd sit in our living room,he'd pour me a drink and himself a drink. And if the kids would come in the room, I'd be like, oh, can't we just have our time alone? I'd be so exasperated when they would literally just be breathing and living and existing in our home. That's supposed to be shared by all of us. But it was like, this is my space, this is my time. And I noticed when we stopped drinking, and my husband stopped drinking as well, that my kids started commenting like we really like you guys not drinking. And listen, we weren't like massive drinkers,But we definitely would have a drinker here too.And I think they felt more included in our lives.And it would be little things like now when JP and I are talking, I don't know why I just find myself, and maybe because I've found other ways to relax before that five o'clock hour, that if I'm having a cup of tea with JP or something, we're talking at night and the kids walk in, I'm like, sit down, tell us about your day.I find that I'm more open to them being with me in those hours and that black and white that I used to have of like my time and mom time is now merged and it's kind of like I,I just coexist with them in a much more.Yeah, you don't need that singular time. I find I don't need my mom time anymore. And in fact, I found that I like to take my personal time away from the home. Like if I'm going to be doing something for myself, I'm not going to be here. No, that sounds like that does sound shitty.It feels better because it's like now I'm like getting up earlier and I'll go and get my walk in at 6am or whatever it is before the kids are awake. And it's like, you get,your time away or I'll go I'm gonna go to a good bookstore by myself. 100% I don't feel like it's that same divide that we used to have in our home back in the days when we drink. I don't know if everyone who drinks feels that way, but I was not expecting it.And I wasn't expecting the kids to be like, we really like you guys sober. I didn't even know you notice. No, I didn't know that it was even going to be a thing. So anyway, and especially with like my oldest two getting older and you know, Asher going into high school next year, JP and I have sort of taken it like one day at a time. Like, I don't know,we're just not drinking today, but we'll see. And John Paul recently said, and I agree with him. He's like, while the kids are in high school, it's done. Like we won't drink in our house. Like that won't ever happen. And I'm like, I think you're right. I feel pretty confident that for the next X amount of years we have kids in high school, I don't foresee us having alcohol.I hope I never want it again. Yeah, I'm done. I'm like, well, it's funny. I was texting with a friend of mine yesterday. I texted her like, I really hope I never want, because I don't white knuckle it. I have zero desire for it. Like I don't see anyone drinking and say, I wish that's where I was. Or I never see somebody three drinks in and be like,place I miss. They're just repeating themselves. And I had to be worse than what they are because I'm a lot in general. It was the hangovers, man. They weren't worth it. Nothing is worth that feeling anymore. And I can just play the tape forward. And when I smell it, it smells gross.Maybe I'm in that pink cloud era. I mean, I hear from other people who've gone through this.Deeper than I have or longer that there's a thing that happens at five years. And I'm like,Okay. If you say so. I mean, I don't know. But I have started talking to Sabat. He's nine,And I've already started to talk to him about alcohol, because he's only like,four years away from when I started having that stuff like people were around me socially drinking was when I was 12 or 13, which is so fucked up when I think about it.Oh, crazy, right? No, I know. And even now, the kids, I feel like, are exposed to things faster and earlier. And it's just wild. No, I think it's smart that you're having those conversations. I don't think it's ever too early to have those kinds of conversations.I think John thinks it's a little too early. And I'm like, I don't know. I wish I was hearing it when I was nine because in my family, it was so glamorized. Drinking seemed so cool.Oh, totally. Totally. Ditto right there with you. So your meditation practice, where did that start?Like, how did that come into your life? So I first got into yoga when I was pregnant,with, okay, do you remember Tom Quinn? You obviously practiced with Tom Quinn before,but I practiced with him and did not connect. And like, oh my God, I was Tom Quinn, like back in the day. It was before I was pregnant with Asher. So it would have been like 15, 16 years ago at like a crunch gym downtown. And that would have been like one of my very first like yoga classes. And And I was like, who is this guy?And he played like cool music.And that was like dipping my toes into yoga. And then I really got into it when I was pregnant.With Asher. I was like, this is it. This is the end all be all.And I really loved it. And I did teacher training after Lillian was born and I started teaching at a core power fitness.Like that was like what I thought yoga was.I'm like, this is awesome.And then we moved up into the North shore of Chicago and I found Yoga View and I took a teacher training all over again because it felt like such a different type of yoga. And that's when I really got into meditation.And even then it was like, I would be into it for like six months and then I'd back off for a month or two.It was sort of like, you know, I'd be really good for then a couple of weeks and then I would like kind of forget about it.And then I'd say like three years ago, like right around COVID, I got really committed into it.And it's a daily practice now. And I can count on one hand how many days I've missed in the past couple of years.I take it very casually. And so there are days where it will be 20 minutes and there are days that it's 10 minutes and someone comes and sits on my lap or I get interrupted.And I almost always do it first thing in the morning but there are days that it doesn't happen and I get interrupted with the kids and I have to do it when the kids go off to school and I come back and I sit on my meditation bolster then.But it's almost never a day that goes by that I don't get my meditation practice in.And it really has been the thing that I think has kept me the most grounded and really changed everything.And this is gonna sound extreme, but I don't think had I been not meditating,I don't think I would have.Gotten sober and I think had I not gotten sober We never would have moved to California and I never would have,Created like my online business the way I had like a lot of things happened because of this snowball effect that meditation sort of opened up for me.Which sounds dramatic that like sitting on a bolster for 15 minutes is gonna change your life You know There are a lot of women who I work with who I help Lead meditations with or get them into a regular meditation practice and so often I get like it's not like doing anything I don't feel it I don't get it.And I think meditation is just one of those things where it doesn't really affect you or you don't notice the effects until it's been a period of time.Like it grows, it builds on each other. So it's not like something you can drop in for a day and then forget about. So I think all those years when I wasn't seeing a difference is because I wasn't consistent with it.And so I always tell people now who are wanting to start a meditation practice,I'm like, I want you to think about it. Whatever's realistic for you that you can be consistent with every day,because the more consistent you are, even if it's just five minutes,you can feel that impact building. What you don't want is the dab in here, dab in there.So that's really the thing that's kind of changed sort of everything for me.I think that meditation is difficult for Americans to wrap their heads around,but I think that there's no money in it. You don't have to pay to meditate,and you can just do it, and we want to be told what to do.And there's all these things, like I had to start doing meditation with doing guided meditation,and I still will do guided meditation.I do a guided meditation with Rangini, who's this amazing lady in Mexico.Every Sunday morning, I do an hour-long guided meditation with this woman, Rangini, but I think that for the longest time I thought I was doing it wrong.I would find myself judging my thoughts and being like, how come I don't get this and why can't I get it?Even that's getting it. Yeah, 100% Mary.Yeah. Because you're still inside of yourself. It's being in the moment.Even sitting here going, I don't get it, I don't get it, you're actually meditating because you're not making a list in your head or thinking about that conversation you had earlier.You're still inside of it.But I do believe that when my life gets off, it's because I stopped doing it every morning.Yeah. I couldn't agree with you more. And I think the number one piece of feedback I always get from women is like, I can't do it or it's not working. I don't know how to, I'm not good at it.As if it's something that again, like we can measure ourself or judge ourself on that like a meditation. I try to explain to people, like there are plenty of meditations.I just had one this morning.I was literally thinking about every single thing I had to do.And old me, years ago, would have been like, that doesn't count, I was doing a bad job.And I'm like, that's just the practice today.That's literally just the practice today.And it was more of the awareness of, wow, you have a lot on your mind, your anxiety is really high. Take good care of yourself.We got to figure some things out. We got to adjust things.And so it's just even that awareness of like, oh, my mind was racing today.That's it. No judgment or anything on it. Mm-hmm.Well, and the fact that your brain was racing, you might be like, maybe I should go to acupuncture.And then all of a sudden, you're kind of thinking about ways to make yourself feel better.100% 100% but I think that you're 100% you're right in saying that there isn't I don't know.If it's because I think there's no money in it or something I don't know what what it is, but I agree with you in that comment about.We like things that someone else is holding us accountable. Let me pay you X amount of money.You tell me what to do. Give me the program in 30 days. Tell me I'm going to feel different.And instead, this is one of those things where it's like there's no equipment needed.There are no excuses. Like it's a very vulnerable experience because to say you can't do it is like to say like,I don't know how to breathe like anyone.Of course, you can do it. You just don't want to do it.And it's the showing up in that daily commitment to yourself.That's really hard to honor.Well, I mean, maybe meditation is just the idea of being disciplined in something.Okay, I'm trying to form this thought as I'm, but like, yesterday on Twitter,there was somebody, like, what's a habit you picked up that has made your life better? And,you know, it was the gamut of, you know, drinking water every day, or quitting drinking, or,you know, I mean, there were probably a thousand responses to this. And I would say that half of them were meditation and journaling. And everybody said it has to be consistent. You have to do it every day. And I think that when we think about, like, what meditation is, it goes back, you know,thousands of years and every civilization, you know, the Mesopotamians and the Indians and even Christianity with prayer, like that's all a version of meditation.That's a daily commitment, a daily ritual. And it really is, that really is what meditation is,It's that daily ritual and commitment to yourself.I remember I was reading an article, an interview with Sting, and this was back when I was judging meditation, being like, how good could it possibly be? There's no way it actually works. Only condescending yerks do, you know. And he's like, I meditate all the time, and I'll be at the stoplight at like Fifth Avenue and Park, and I'll just meditate while the light's changing. And I'm like, fuck you, man. You're not meditating. And I'm like, now I'm like, yes, Sting was right.And I think about it a lot. I think about Sting meditating on that corner, and I'm like.You know, just going into yourself and just giving yourself a moment of like, grounding yourself.Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And I would get a lot of feedback from women when they're starting this of like, oh, can walking be a form of meditation? Can poetry, can this, this is a form of meditation?And I always think like, yes, of course. Yes. But it's yes and I think you still have to show up on your bolster every day. You still have to show up on your mat every day. And then you have those opportunities when you're sitting in a stoplight that you can say, okay, I can turn inward because it's much easier to like define that grounding at a red stoplight. But I have found for people to want to replace the work of sitting on a bolster for 10 minutes or 20 minutes or whatever,sitting on your cushion, your seat, and replace it with like, well, when I'm out in nature,I don't walk, it's meditating. And I think like it can be short, and you still have to show up on your bolster. Is 20 minutes what your goal is every day? That's what feels the best for me.It's nice for me. I find that if I do it first thing in the morning, and I'm an early riser,and I'd like to get up and just get it done with. Yeah, it feels really good. 20 minutes is a good amount for me. And right now, I just do it unguided and that feels good for me, but that doesn't mean a month from now it won't be different. And I try to be really gray about some of that. I'm like, it's going to evolve and change depending on what's going on in my life. And right now, that's what feels really good.So you lead a meditation group. Yeah. So it started after COVID, the year after COVID. So I started a food blog years ago. I went to culinary school. I worked in a kitchen for a little bit, but had kids right away and I made zero money in a kitchen.My babysitters cost more than I was making. And so I stayed home with the kids. And after my fourth was born, I was like, I need something. But I couldn't go back into a kitchen. It just didn't make sense. And JP was traveling all the time. So I started a food blog. And I was like,that's going to be great. And I'm just going to write about food, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.And I'll be honest, it was really fun. It was never meant to make any money. It was just a creative outlet. I needed to do something with myself. And as that sort of grew, I would share other parts of my life. And post-COVID, I'd show myself in the morning meditating. And I'd get so so many questions. Nobody gave a shit about the salad I was making. Everyone's like, so why are you meditating? Tell me about it. Can we talk more about that? I really found that people are craving something to get reconnected with themselves. I feel like right now more than ever, we are all living really disconnected from ourselves. I think we're all craving this homecoming to our own bodies. We were raised in a world that's just detached, detached.And it was like fill your emotions with whether it's over scheduling yourself, whether it's overworking, whether it's over consuming food, wine, whatever it may be.We really were never taught, at least I was not taught any coping mechanisms to like get back in my body.And so I found that women were really curious about, you know, what is it doing? What's the benefit?And so I opened it up and said, would anyone want to meditate with me?And I was really overwhelmed right away with the response of how many women said, yes,I will meditate with you. And I just said, let's do it. It was super casual.Let's just do it for 30 days and see how it goes.And the response was overwhelming with the amount of women who felt a huge like how many60 women sign up for the. Oh, my God.I was like, I don't really have to. I don't have to do that.You're like, we want to do this. And I was like, you're also like, am I qualified to do that?And then I was realizing I don't have to be qualified. All I'm doing is offer them a space.And all I'm doing is saying we're all accountable and I'm going to do it.And so you're going to do it. And let's all keep each other accountable.And I think that especially that first round, everyone was really committed.Because again, I think people wanted something was post COVID.And I think that's what we're all doing. And I think that's what we're all doing.Accountable, and I'm going to do it, and so you're going to do it, and let's all keep each other accountable." And I think that, especially that first round, everyone was really committed.Because again, I think people wanted something. It was post-COVID. It was this feeling of like,wine certainly isn't doing it. I can't work out anymore. There's no diet, but like,something in my life has to fix. And it was starting to realize like, well, the answer is,it aren't all these things out here, out there. The answers are just literally right here within me. It's just getting quiet. And people had commented like, my marriage is totally different.My parenting is different. I'm changing jobs because of this now. I realized I want to move...So many things opened up for women. And so I said, we have to do it again. We have to keep doing it.And so we did five more rounds of it. And it was each round with different groups of dynamics of women. But it's been wonderful. I'm taking a break right now. I'm taking actually a little social media hiatus too. I'm just taking a little pause. But we'll definitely be back leading more of these because it just, A, it really filled my soul of like, I feel like what I was called,world to share, not in any way as an expert of just like, this is how it's changed my let me share with you what's worked for me because I think we need it.When you say you're doing rounds like it's just like every day we just we just know,They would just last for four weeks. So we would all agree to whatever the parameters were But it would be for four weeks We would do a group a group would stay together like a little container And so I don't have a session right now of women that i'm leading right now So right now we have we're not offering anything, but do they just meet every morning on zoom for 30 minutes?There was a platform that we had a lot of guided meditations on whether it be video and audio meditations,you could listen on your own.And we did, we met via Zoom once a week, and then we meet on Instagram Live,and I would do live meditations on IG Live, and then every day people would send me their photos in the morning.So like I meditated, here's my picture, here's me. So it was just like an accountability check.So there were like a couple of different components of it, but they could really do it sort of like on their own.There wasn't a set time, like you had to be someplace every day.So you could use the video or audio meditations on your own whenever you wanted,or meditate on your own. You just had to check in and be like,I did it for today, check. and I get my checks the day.And it was great. I think just having that accountability really is what people were lacking and sort of missing.And I think also the dynamics of being on Zoom with a community of people who aren't your neighbor,you don't have kids in the same class, it would be women from all over the country who didn't know each other, all walks of life, of saying,I have everything in the world that I could possibly want. I've got a husband,a partnership that I love, and I'm happy in my job, and I've got kids, and yet I'm still really unhappy. And so many women could relate to that story of, yeah, I'm just not fulfilled.And I'm in my mid-40s, and I don't know what it is that I'm searching for, but I'm clearly searching for something. And then at the end of the four weeks, sort of finding,oh, I think the thing I was missing is me. And feeling that sense of homecoming for themselves,it was really, really powerful. And doing it in a way that felt non-threatening. And you weren't going to run into the person at the grocery store after you just cried to them.So you know, there's something really powerful about that, like being seen, but in a way that feels safe. Support for this podcast is brought to you by Toast & Jam DJs, my very super cool DJ company located here in Chicago, Illinois.If you are having any kind of party, a wedding, a birthday, a jamboree, maybe an office party,a gala, shrimp boil, store opening, we've done some 5Ks.If you need music for anything, you probably need us. We have also added to our things that we do, photo booths.And our photo booths are super cute, they're pink, and they've got a sequin backdrop,and they can make gifts and boomerangs that can be texted out from the booth at the party.They're very cool.So if that is something that you want, In theory, this ad is for local to the Chicagoland area,but you know, money's the same color everywhere.So if you wanna fly us to wherever you are, especially if you are in the general Hawaii vicinity,perhaps, we have done a lot of destination events and we will make it very awesome indeed.Go to www.toastandjamdjs.com, Check out our website and give us a hire.That's amazing. And just that you started it by like, Oh, I'm just gonna open up Instagram and see if anybody cares. And then 60 people care. And it's like, that's insane. It's a lesson on,you know, follow your heart. Like if you feel like something is there.And I think that was going back to then not to connect this to the move to California,or to even like sobriety of these things. But a lot of these decisions sort of happen after.That program had such great success in the beginning. And it really taught me like,Like you don't have to know how you're going to do it.When I first said, do you want to meditate with me?I didn't know how to sell stuff online. I had no idea.I'm like, zoom, like none of the logistics were figured out.Like none of it made any sense to me. I'm like, I have no idea how we're going to do this.But I think the thing I found out is that when you're doing something that's really aligned with your values and who you are, and that's really intentional,and you take like grounded action every day to make it happen,the universe sort of like gives you the answer.It sort of just like unfolds, it opens up for you. And that was sort of the thing too,like when we decided to move, I'm like, I think I'm going to move, let's do it.And I was like, I'm gonna trust that the universe is gonna show me how to do this.It's gonna present itself.It's gonna work itself out. And I think that that program sort of was one of those things that I didn't have to have the answers. And I'm so glad I didn't go in being like,we're gonna do X, Y, and Z. Does anyone wanna come do it with me?It was more just like, I don't really know, but my intention is this is the feeling I want you to get.And then I let all of my actions come from that feeling. I think that's one of the things that's kind of going on in the world with just all the upheaval that's happening right now.And everything just feels kind of gicky and weird in the world.Like, I feel like we used to kind of be more fabric-y. We were all kind of together more,and there was less division. And I think that everything started getting kind of icky.Like, post, you know, 9-11.People kind of went into themselves more, because you didn't know who you could trust.And you didn't want to know how people thought, because you didn't want to have to dislike them,because they were different from you. They were a Republican or a Democrat,whatever your thing is.And then we lose our villages. It's hard to raise a kid, because you feel guilty.You look like a bad parent if you ask for help, or whatever, you know, all these.It's a very fucked up time.As if I know anything else, but it feels fucked up. And I think, like you said, we're craving connection.I've got a partner, a house, a kid, a dog. I don't know why I don't feel anything.And it's because we're so programmed to just buy things or whatever.And it's like meditation, it just makes you go inside yourself,and maybe even begin to like yourself.Because Lord knows as women, we get messages all the time. You're not enough.You're not pretty enough. You're not skinny enough.If I could add up all the time I spend thinking about how fat I am.The first 40 years of my life, I spent hating myself, not even knowing that that's what I was doing.I didn't know that I was hating myself, but that's what I was doing.And it's just because that's what I was taught to do. And that's what I saw around me.And that's what every woman I knew was doing. We're all putting ourselves down.We're all, you know, like in our own way, like not good enough.And I think you see all of these people around you, just going back to what you said about, you know,I look around now and it can be so easy. And that's one of the reasons I'm actually taking a break from social media. It's so easy to see.Swarms of people around you who have the partner who have the house who have the this and they're vacationing and they look happy And I know I know deep down that a majority those people are still going to bed at night putting their head on the pillow Being like I feel like shit,What didn't I do today or like I didn't do this well Or I snapped at my kids and like we're going to bed with these hearts that are so heavy,No matter how beautiful looks on the outside And I don't have the answers of how we get back or how we don't think I've actually ever been to the place Let's say how we get back. I don't know that we've ever been to that place of.Of how we feel on the inside is how we present on the outside.And that those two worlds, like how we're showing up in the world and maneuvering the world is actually how we show up.I think, and this is going on a tangent, so forgive me, but I think we are so used to asking people, like, how are you? And everyone's like, fine.And I loved it earlier when I asked you, like, how are you? And you did not say fine.And I think we go around just assuming that we're fine. And so we think everybody else is fine.And deep down, we're like, but I'm actually not fine.And I think just the fact that we live in a world where that's the accepted phrase, default, is crazy.I'm like, how is anybody fine? Please tell me you're not because I'm not.Yeah, well, and sometimes I'm great, but usually I'm not. And that's the thing that sucks. I wish I was fine more than I'm not fine. Because you know what's so crazy is after I got back from Panama, I remember when I was in Panama, even saying to Amy, my best friend that I was on the trip with, like, I feel good for the first time in years. Like I actually felt like I was in control of things and that I knew what was happening. And I was so happy. And I got back back from Panama and I was so happy.And then I had a bunch of terrible work things kind of dumped on me like right away after I got back.And I was like, it's fine. I actually can handle these things.And then eventually the high of that wore off and it's like, wow, I've just been chasing that happy high.Like I hadn't felt it in so long.So like, I'm gonna figure it out because I wanna be happier all the time.I know, right? I felt that same way coming from Panama. It was like almost a little bit of a crash.I mean, it sounds like yours was a little bit more sustained, like you felt good for a little bit longer.But it would be wonderful to be able to set up our lives that we can recreate that same feeling in our everyday life.I think that would be so powerful. And what an amazing, you know, I look at the legacy I'm leaving for my kids, or just what I'm trying to teach them.I'm like, I hope that they grow up in a world where they can see that they set themselves up and have the tools to be able to take care of themselves in a different way in a healthier way than I learned.Because I think we're gonna hopefully this next generation set up for a little more,genuine like peace and contentment and ease and to move through their days without feeling this.I'm going to just say the word anxiety because I don't know what else to call it, but it's like,pull at their hearts to just live in a way that feels like easeful and content and peaceful would be such a gift. I feel better with myself mentally in my 40s than any other one because I just feel like I know myself better. I know what I will put up with and what I won't put up with, etc.But I'm also kind of wondering, what does it all mean? You know, having to like,you know, and kind of really going like, this can't be what life is. You get made to be a human on the earth to just, you know, be fine and then sometimes miserable and have brief flashes of happiness and then die.Like I can't just be what this is. And I would like to get to a point where like I,feel like so much of advertising is engineered towards making us feel like shit about ourselves so we can buy the things so that we feel better about ourselves.And we're constantly being fed with ads all the time. Is that why we feel like shit all the time?Yeah, I mean, I think that's a huge part of it. I think social media also plays a huge part in it.And I think social media is a beautiful, beautiful tool. I really do.And I think it can be really used for good.And I think all these things are, in and of themselves, are not inherently good or bad, but the way that they're used.And I will tell you, I definitely notice that I feel a difference.When I go on social, there'll be moments where I'm like, OK,so now I definitely need to intermittent fast differently.I have a wrong bra. I need eye cream. I need to get this course on SEO to help my blog.I clearly am not doing the right pelvic floor exercises.So I feel like I'm like, oh my god, I'm so exhausted and I just opened my phone and my to-do list now just grew. I clearly don't know anything about anything.Wait, so do you take like whole social media breaks? Like you don't even open up the days?I mean, I will check here or there, but I took the app off my phone about a month ago.Well, I was really only on Instagram. I'm not on Twitter, although I would happily my husband's like you need to get on Twitter. It's so much better,There's a huge difference between after Ilan took over like it's just yeah same. That's all that I have I don't have any other social media things. I don't know and my kids aren't on that. I had to think of goodness But definitely all of their friends are both my oldest you there I think one of the only people that we know who aren't in that age bracket, which is also really Gary.But that's a whole nother conversation for another day.Yeah, it's a terrible conversation. I mean, I let my son watch YouTube and I'm bad about it.It's like the thing where I'm like, this is where my bad parents...Like I just let him watch YouTube and no, I mostly know what he's watching.It's just, I'm afraid that there's like subliminal messages getting in there that are like, you know, razor blades in your eyeballs are cool.I don't know. Oh my gosh, Mary, I love you. Do you remember when razor blades in like, you said like Halloween candy was like, I still like check my kids candy for razor blades.Like, what are you doing? I'm like, yeah. People were raising things.And they're like, mom, I don't think they ever did that. I'm like, no, they did.They did. Yeah, no, it was definitely a thing. We all felt it.Here last year, there was a lot of alarm that people were putting weed edibles into kids' candy.And I'm like, the fuck they are. I think there would be like a lot of suffering giving away stuff that they want. I'm like, why would they do that?It's really expensive too.And you're never gonna see the results of it because no parent's gonna let their kid eat loose candy.And they don't individually like wrap an edible. So that was a thing, like we talked about. Yeah.Yeah, like it was on the news. And it was like, ugh, that's the most manufactured crisis that I've ever had.They were low on stories for the night.Exactly. Exactly. I also started... I've gone and seen Anne Wildman a few times. Oh, really?I knew who you were talking about. Okay, do you want to share?Sure. I mean, Anne is an intuitive healer. And I got a lot of crazy piece from her.I mean, I guess talking about like, just people like her in general, like people that have a mystical...Bent to them or figure out that they've got these skills like like even Channing Nicholas the astrologer,You know like listening who you introduced me to I'm a pain on the app I look at it every day. I know I talked to you on an bus fall. I've got a tech Yeah, I know anything they have to do now with this woman. I mean, I know,Really? I like I was saying what I was funny cuz every morning when I'm meditating I think to myself I know Katie does 20 minutes and then she journals and.I'm not meditating long enough I need to like have a session with Katie where she tells me what she does that I can do it Like it's like this weird like, you know, I, but I do, I literally think about you almost every day when I'm meditating, which I think is be a great thing for you to like, that's a good connection.It's not like I'm like, Oh, I'm eating my fifth piece of pizza. No, I love it.No, I love it. And I love it. And she was really helpful for me post hysterectomy.She was really helpful for like, so I didn't really understand I, and this is way too long.Why don't you go back and go to like, why would, why did you get a hysterectomy?Before and never once in my life did anyone say to me, you probably need a hysterectomy.Like that was never on my radar. Like that's never been something that was talked about.Yeah, me neither. And there's a new book out, it's called Womb.I cannot remember the author, so I'll text it to you, but you can maybe put it in your show notes or something.I don't know why I just told you what to do. Like, and you could put it in your show notes.But it was a really great book and the author in there was saying that right now, and it just came out,that the statistics for hysterectomies are one in every three women by the age of 60will have her uterus removed.Which Mary, it's very high, it's a very high number. That's insane. Why?Why are we getting our testorectomies? So many reasons. So the book goes into like huge details about like what the thought is around it, but really it's sort of like it's become.Just kind of the go to for like, if something's wrong in your uterus post 40, it's like just have a hysterectomy. And you know, so many women now are having, and I don't have a statistics on it,like, I don't know what the different things that people are having, but whether it's endometriosis or fibroids, or gasses, or like just bad periods, and they're really for Western medicine, you know,it's kind of just like, it is what it is, at least that's what I've been told for so long.And I can only speak to my story. But from so many other women who reached out to me post hysterectomy of like, that's sort of what I've been told to is like past 40. If you have an issue. It's like, let's just remove it. And so I had had a pretty bad fibroid that I had,removed about a year ago and didn't think anything of it. Moved out to California and was just having a lot of complications and my hormones were off and I couldn't figure out why.And I went in and had a new OB. And really I only went into this OB because in order to get put on hormone replacement therapy, I had to have a mammogram. And to get a mammogram, you have to have a doctor. I was like, motherfucker, I went into this OB really so I could get my prescription.And she's like, you shouldn't be bleeding this much. Let's do a really quick ultrasound. So we did a super quick ultrasound. And she's like, you have a mass the size of a small lemon in your uterus. And I was like, what? I don't think so. And she was immediately like, you really don't have any other options besides you have to have a hysterectomy. And I will be honest with you,I had had a biopsy done on my uterus and a fibroid the year before. And this is the second biopsy that I had done in a matter of 12 months.And I had said to my husband, like, I don't want to mess around with this anymore.Like, let's just take it out.But I was definitely under the guise of no big deal. You'll just have it taken out and you'll be fine.And I will tell you, I woke up from that surgery, couldn't stop crying.And it wasn't because I was in pain. I was like, oh my God, what's wrong with me?I felt like a completely different person. And I know myself pretty well.And I'm a pretty grounded, stable person. Like, it takes a lot to throw me.I've got four kids, we move across the country.You gotta give me a lot to throw me. I'm pretty like straight.And so I knew something was off right away.And every story... Wait, from the history, right? It was just like...Is it because you could feel like the lack of whatever? Like a grieving period as women that I don't think we understand how much of our intuition how much of our own essence and our,Power our creativity lies within our womb space and i'm just going to call it a womb space that includes like all the different parts Right. So your womb carries really like the essence of who you are and I didn't understand that surgically removing that organ,Would also make me energetically feel totally different.But it really was a much more emotional experience than I was expecting and I'm starting to understand now from just people who all of a sudden come out of the woodworks when I share that I had a hysterectomy. So many women came like, me too.I'm just going to give you a heads up that you might feel a little blue.Things are going to be weird. It'll balance out. And I will say, hormonally, I feel like I'm balanced out, but there definitely is still this ease.And then I worked with Ann Westphal who did a little bit to help me of like reconnecting as if your womb was still there.I've done a lot of... For about a month or so there, I did every day a womb meditation on just healing my womb space, even though it was gone, of just creating energetically seeing that still being whole and intact. And then really reconnecting with my children, because again, our connection to our kids is from that area. And I will tell you the thing that was hard is... Not necessarily hard,but I wasn't prepared for is I have been in a million and one different doctor's offices,as I'm sure you have too. And I have read every single brochure from like,you need to get this for this and you need to do this and every single amount of after having four kids, I think I've been to the doctor's like a hundred plus times.And never once did someone say to me, you know, the odds are you'll probably have a hysterectomy at some point because of fibroids or because of endometriosis. And I felt like I was not prepared.And then the aftercare is just not there. It is just like, you're on your way, you'll be fine.And I think the thing that's really scary is I think about like, I don't mean to turn this into a gender thing, but if one in every three men were walking around with their balls cut off,we'd be having a conversation about this. And so I think the conversation is like,A, how are we getting to this point that so many of us have uteruses that are bleeding,that are having clots, that are having clumps?What is it that's happening and why aren't we getting answers so that these are preventable?And then B, how is the only answer, just remove the organ that makes you a woman?And how effective is that?That organ is so highly, it's just controversial. It's not a part, it's not needed.You know what I mean? Well, especially after you're 40, if you're not there to make kids anymore.It is not needed. And I think the thing is, is that there's such a taking over a woman's power when that organ is taken out.And I really do feel like it is a thing about power and creativity and energy, all this stuff.Like you're taking away the essence of a woman. And I know that there are many women who would say like, I'm fine, I had a hysterectomy a decade ago and I'm fine. And yes, I'm sure there are many women who are fine, but I'm going to just speak for the majority who I feel like probably aren't fine post hysterectomy of like, there has to be a better answer.So do you regret taking it out? I don't regret taking it out.The picture of the mass post-surgery and it literally was looking at a huge white mass.And I will say, there's not an ounce of me that feels regret because God forbid that that turned into something else, my health and being alive, I don't take it for granted.I wish I would have had an option that we didn't get to that point that that mass grew to that size and that that would have been preventable. And I'm not angry, maybe a little angry that I wasn't more prepared, that there wasn't literature out there, there wasn't books, there weren't blogs,there weren't no one on Instagram, out of all the things I listen to, no one on Instagram is like,so at 48 a hysterectomy, I'm like, where are all the other 40 year olds who are having hysterectomies because I know they're out there. And I just think it's not talked about.You know, it's how all women's health I feel like is dealt with. And maybe you're this way,But I'm the kind of person where I have to know everything that's happening to me.Like when I'm at the dentist, I'm like, what's that thing going to do?I need to know everything that happens to me. And when you are pregnant, I mean, I only was pregnant once that went to term and.I took a 12-week-long childbirth class and I wanted to know everything.And a lot of people don't feel that way. They're like, ugh, I just was like, whatever he says to do, I'm just going to do it.And it's like, when you surrender that knowledge, then it's hard to get it back.Like I think a lot of people just kind of accept it as like the answer.And I think also there's like, you know, if you complain about it, you're less of a woman.Like if you don't totally love being a mom, you're an asshole.Or if so, no one talks about the fact that sometimes it sucks being a mom or, you know, like I had a hysterectomy and I was fine.It's like, well, okay. Or you sound pretty defensive about it.No, for sure. Or like miscarriages or women who don't want to have children. Right.Like so many issues around being a woman and especially our reproductive organs and how they're used or how we feel about them is still to this day in 2023, like kind of off the table and sort of taboo. And it makes me really sad. And, you know, I've been really vocal with my kids about my experience with my hysterectomy. And I would say to Lillian,like, I hope you do everything you can that when you are in your 80s, that you still have your uterus in you. And so like, you need to find it to like have these kinds of conversations with your doctor at an earlier age.What do you think you could have done differently? Or what do you think?You should have done or what do you think someone should have done to you that would have prevented this from happening?You know, I'm not really sure, but when I had my fibroid removed,that was back when I was still living in Chicago, right before we moved,I think then that I didn't push hard enough to be like, why is it there? Why do I have fibroids?And I think this whole thing of like fibroids or endometriosis is just so...No one asks questions like, why or what could we do to prevent it?It's just sort of like, well, it's so common, right? Everything is like, well, it's very common.You know, I was bleeding horribly for years and had complained about I was anemic and a lot of my hormones are messed up for the amount of blood that I was losing every month.And that was just told, that's just normal. And I think sometimes just because things happen to a lot of us, that it's assumed that that's just the way it is.And I wish that more women spoke up to be like, yeah, my periods are crazy heavy.I can't leave the house for two days or I'm also anemic.And that we kind of pushed back a little bit on Western medicine, that there could be some,I don't know why we're not doing any research, like, why are so many women with fibroids?Why are we having endometriosis? And why are women bleeding horrifically?I don't know like what I could have done differently other than I just wish I would have pushed a little harder to gotten more answers.I think I just took whatever they said.She'd be like, okay. So last year before I moved, I'd had that removed.It's called a myomectomy is the name of the procedure. And I think I was just like, okay, sure.And I was like, I'll be fine. No big deal.And, you know, I didn't really understand like, well, a fiber will come right back and it just grows right back and it comes back stronger and bigger.And I mean, at least mine did from my experience. And my fiber was not that big.And then all of a sudden I had this mass that was the size of a lemon.You know, so I was like, huh. So that's like, it was protruding.I was like, my stomach was really big and bloated. And they're like, fine, fine.Just, you need to eat better. Eat more protein.I'm like, oh, it's so good. Yeah.You're like, but I've got a four month old tumor inside of me is like the size of a four month old fetus.I think the only advice I've ever been given around like not feeling my best has been eat more protein and lift weights. And just don't eat after seven o'clock. I was like, what?So, you know, I don't know. And just like get better tampons.Like that's been sort of like the only advice I've been given by the medical community.So here I am.Maybe it's like scented tampons or what made that happen or something like that.Wasn't all my tampons that made this happen?Like I don't know. You know, so here I am a uterus gone later.And I feel if anything, this is sort of like woken up something in me to sort of fight for women's rights more.And it's, you know, along with like sharing about my meditation journal, now this will be a new part of me that's like, you know, post 40 women's health is clearly not being discussed as much as it should be.And I am in no way about to go into like my late 40s and 50s and being like, this is as good as it gets, because it's got to be better. And we all deserve better than this.And I think we're a forgotten group. And it's not okay by me.If it's definitely fueled something in me, my fire has been stoked.Yeah, well, I think if you're able to make meditation, like make this meditation, I see that you could do something even if you decided to.There would be a lot of them or people that are like, you know, I mean, like my little sister and I'm sorry, Robin, if you're not mad, I'm bringing you up but like, she has like really weird period, not weird, but very heavy.She's always had really heavy periods and like, and I bet her doctors never really questioned too terribly much about it.And it's just like, well, it's just sort of the deal. And I hate saying this, but I don't want her to be one of those women like a decade from now like is having her uterus taken out, you know, it's like, because clearly someone knows like her peers are abnormal right now, right?Like that's something going on. And there should be got to fight to get better answers, whether it's like more research and like funding for this, but it feels not good enough.No, it's not.So we're kind of sorry. We've I feel like we know, no, we can just keep doing this.No, but your your situation is closed right now.Do you have a name? What's the name of your program? Restore. But I don't know what this next iteration will be called if we change it up. But that's what it was called. But you can always find me on katyrexing.com. And I always have the latest information of any offerings that are going on there. You also have a really good newsletter.And I like that it's not spammy. And it's not like every day. I like that when it pops up,I'm like, Oh, this is one of the few ones. Oh, thank you. I was actually just working on one for this weekend. I don't know if I'm going to finish it in time, but it's a little lengthy about,Moving and all this kind of stuff, but thank you. I really enjoy that. I like sending out those. So, thank you,So, how can people find you so?Katie racing down and I guess and then Katie rexing at Instagram and I'll be back on it soon,I'll be back there soon and,That's really it those two places The best way to find me and you could always be a pleasure to anything like I always answer any of my questions via The blog so if you have any questions or anything pops up like you can always find me on the blog and I love I love connecting with women via email or via the blog.It's just such a great way versus Instagram. It feels like a better way to connect.So happy to get messages there. Don't slide into your DMs. Is that what you're saying?I mean, you can, but I feel like we can have a lengthier conversation over on the blog. Yeah.Perfection. Well, Katie, thank you so much. This has been amazing. Thank you, Mary.This was so fun. I always love chatting with you. I didn't know what to expect, and of course it was so fun.I'm like, if nothing else, we'll have a couple of laps, just catch up.So it was so nice. Thank you so much. I loved it. I love you.Thanks for listening to All Up In My Lady Business, a podcast from a Mary Nisi production.It is written by me, Mary Nisi. It is edited by Amelia Ruby with Softer Sounds. It is recorded at the Toast & Jam offices in Logan Square in Chicago, Illinois. And it is also sometimes,recorded in the attic of my house in Evanston. You can find resources and links from this,episode in the show notes at all up in myladybusiness.com. And if you enjoyed this episode, and you did,smash that subscribe button and send it to somebody who's ass could be a whole lot holer.Oh, and also, if you're the kind of person that reviews things on the internet, please rate and review us on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. It really does help people find the show.And don't forget, whatever you do this week, do it with your whole ass.Thanks for listening.Music.